Sodoma Law News

Nicole Sodoma named Super Lawyer 2012

2012-01-26T18:58:28+00:00

Celebrating 100 Years

2012-01-21T18:19:51+00:00

Sodoma Law joined the Mecklenburg County Bar in celebrating its Centennial Anniversary this week. Beginning with the exhibit at the Levine Museum of the New South, the month\'s celebrations are expected to be the most exciting events the bar has ever hosted. The journey from one lone lawyer in a colonial town to more than 4,400 lawyers in 2012 has been remarkable. Not only were the attorneys of Sodoma Law proud to participate in the week\'s kick-off festivities, but each is proud to be a member of the Mecklenburg County Bar and legal community.

Congratulations MCB!

For more information, check out: http://www.meckbar.org/newsevents/news_detail.cfm?cont_id=6859

Steve\'s Coats for Kids Success!

2012-01-14T01:15:33+00:00

Attorneys Nadia Margherio and Nicole Sodoma were proud to participate and collect new and gently worn coats for "Steve\'s Coats for Kids" . Chief Meteorologist Steve Udelson at WSOC, in partnership with Crisis Assistance Ministries, sponsored this coat drive by collecting coats to keep local kids warm this winter. Thanks to all of you who delivered coats and for making a difference in our community.

Free Seminar - January 17, 2012!

2012-01-11T03:00:44+00:00

Don\'t miss the "Top Ten Mistakes to Avoid When Untying the Know" offered by Sodoma Law on January 17, 2012.

Do you regularly encounter people--whether clients, friends, family--who are considering untying the knot? Would you like to have a better understanding of the potentially devastating pitfalls people should avoid? Join attorneys at Sodoma Law on January 17 at 5:30 for a free seminar.

RSVPs preferred to bhinds@sodomalaw.com. See you there!

Help Sodoma Law Support Steve\'s Coats for Kids

2012-01-05T22:33:44+00:00

Please join us in supporting Steve\'s Coats by dropping off new or gently worn coats at our offices for children of all sizes and ages. We will be delivering the coats to WSOC on Friday, January 13, 2012. For more information, please contact info@sodomalaw.com or go to http://www.wsoctv.com/coats/index.html.

Thank you!

Finally Handling Your Estate Planning?

2012-01-04T00:45:38+00:00

Is finally getting around to estate planning among your goals for 2012? Take the first step by learning more about the various aspects of estate planning. Get more information at our website - Practice Area: Estate Planning. Let our experienced attorneys at Sodoma Law help.

Happy New Year from Sodoma Law

2011-12-31T01:20:21+00:00

Wishing you all a safe, healthy and happy New Year from Sodoma Law. Our office will be closed for the holiday on Monday, January 2, 2012 but will re-open on Tuesday, January 3, 2012 at 8:30 am. Thank you and Enjoy!

Happy Holidays from Sodoma Law!

2011-12-23T21:51:48+00:00

Our offices will be closed for the holiday and will re-open on Tuesday, December 27, 2011 at 8:30 am. Thank you. Happy Holidays!

Sodoma Law hosts Domestic Court Bar Committee Party

2011-12-17T00:18:23+00:00

Sodoma Law was honored to co-host the 7th Annual Mecklenburg County Domestic Court Bar Committee Holiday Party on Thursday, December 15, 2011. The event was a great opportunity for members of the Family Law Section and Domestic Court Bar Committee to gather together in the spirit of the holiday season. Thanks to all of the generous guests, in collaboration with the Family Court Adminstrator\'s Office, Sodoma Law was able to collect and donate unwrapped toys throughout the Charlotte community through the Salvation Army\'s Angel Tree Program.

Happy Holidays!

Thanks to Nicole Sodoma for being a \"Good Friend\"

2011-12-15T22:01:57+00:00

On Tuesday, December 13, 2011, Nicole Sodoma joined over 800 other Good Friends at the Grady Cole Center to celebrate a 25th Anniversary of the organization as well as to support its annual fundraiser. Together, in less than one hour, Good Friends raised over $120,000!

Good Friends is a diverse group of women representing different cultural, ethnic and religious backgrounds. It is a non-profit organization of women committed to raising money to provide financial assistance to individuals and families in Mecklenburg County, North Carolina. For more information, go to www.goodfriendscharlotte.us.

Attorney Deb Dilman named to the Charlotte Women\'s Bar Board

2011-12-13T15:46:56+00:00

Attorney Deb Dilman accepted the nomination to the Board of the Charlotte Women\'s Bar for a second term. At the Dilworth location of Sodoma Law, she hosted the Board\'s final meeting of 2011 and is looking forward to hosting the planning session for 2012. Congratulations Deb!

Bowling for Families in Need of Holiday Cheer!

2011-12-05T15:57:03+00:00

On Saturday, December 3, Sodoma Law teamed with the Business Leaders of Charlotte in the 7th Annual BLOC-N-BOWL bowling tournament. All pledged their support and donations for families in the Charlotte Community. With the funds collected, hundreds of holiday gifts will be purchased, wrapped and distributed to families before Christmas Day.

Thank you to Sodoma Law and the other teams who participated in this wonderful holiday event.

Child Support Calculator?

2011-12-02T15:19:03+00:00

Did you know Sodoma Law offers its own child support calculator? Whether you have primary, secondary or share joint physical custody of your children, our calculator will provide you with the support obligation that fits your circumstances. For questions, please contact one of our attorneys. You can find the child support calculator at http://www.sodomalaw.com/?section=calculator

Ronald McDonald House of Charlotte

2011-12-01T17:31:57+00:00

Attorney Laura Manfreda of Sodoma Law was proud to host the Ronald McDonald House of Charlotte\'s Young Professionals Board Holiday Party at the firm\'s Dilworth location. Ms. Manfreda is a member of the Board which supports the Ronald McDonald House in its mission of offering hope and support to families struggling with children\'s illness. For more information, see http://rmhofcharlotte.org/.

Free Seminar! Save the Date!

2011-11-28T20:27:22+00:00

Top 10 Mistakes to Avoid When Untying the Knot.

Join us on Tuesday, January 17, 2012 at 5:30 pm for a free seminar!

Avoiding some potentially devastating pitfalls can make the process of untying the knot much smoother and will ensure a better end result for you and your family. Attorneys Misty Hardison, Laura Manfreda and Larissa Stein of Sodoma Law, P.C. will be offering this free seminar at the firm\'s Dilworth location.

Please feel free to invite colleagues, friends and family that may be interested. This seminar is designed for those who would benefit professionally from having a working knowledge of the issues and the process, as well as those personally considering separation.

Light refreshments will be served. Please RSVP at 704.442.0000 or by email to bhinds@sodomalaw.com by January 13, 2012.

We look forward to seeing you soon.

Happy Thanksgiving from Sodoma Law!

2011-11-24T19:55:09+00:00

Wishing you a Happy Thanksgiving Holiday. Our office will be closed on Thursday, November 24 and Friday, November 25, 2011. Thank You!

United Family Services Domestic Violence Campaign Success!

2011-10-20T14:09:50+00:00

On Wednesday, October 19, 2011, the Charlotte Women\'s Bar and the Mecklenburg County Medical Society Women Physicians Section hosted a fall fashion presentation by Nordstrom to benefit the United Family Services\' new Domestic Violence facility in Charlotte. The event was held at the Bechtler Museum of Modern Art at the Levince Center of the Arts. The fundraiser was a huge success as coordinated by a talented committee of supporters, to include attorney Deb Dilman. It was an extraordinary evening with an amazing collaboration of women professionals in the Charlotte community.

Collaborative Law Offers Dignified Answer to Traditional Divorce

2011-10-11T01:49:42+00:00

When most people hear the words “divorce proceedings”, it conjures up scary images of impersonal court rooms and the airing of the marriage’s dirty laundry in court. Feelings of embarrassment and uncertainty are also common. However, most people are unaware that Mecklenburg County provides an alternative to the traditional adversarial divorce proceedings. This relatively new concept in the family law court systems is called collaborative law.

Just like the name states, collaborative law allows parties to work together, with their attorneys, instead of against each other. This approach allows parties to decide what will work best for their family’s needs, instead of a judge making these decisions. Many families find that there are several emotional benefits to the process. Attorneys working in a collaborative law divorce are working toward similar goals, giving respect to each side of the case, and they are trying to create solutions that work for both parties’ needs. In addition, private financial information of the parties will be kept out of public court records.

In addition to the emotional benefits for all parties involved, all discussions and decisions during a collaborative law divorce will be made outside the courtroom, meaning a lengthy and costly litigation is not needed.

Although collaborative law is still an emerging area of family law, the benefits of this dignified process have been numerous. In order to proceed with a collaborative law, clients need insure their attorney is a collaborative law certified attorney. If you feel collaborative law may be right for you and your family, please visit Mecklenburg County’s collaborative law website http://www.mecklenburgcollaborative.org/ for more information.

Attorneys Deb Dilman and Nadia Margherio Offer Live Seminar at Second Saturday

2011-09-14T18:56:25+00:00

On Saturday, September 10, 2011, attorneys Deb Dilman and Nadia Margherio participated in a Second Saturday workshop. This program is designed to help educate people who are considering un-tying the knot. Participants gain a better understanding of their legal and financial issues from our attorneys, local mediators, and financial planners in addition to receiving advice from local counselors and therapists. Thank you to Deb and Nadia for all of your efforts!

Welcome attorney Laura C. Manfreda!

2011-08-22T14:37:42+00:00

Please join us in welcoming our newest attorney at Sodoma Law, P.C. Laura C. Manfreda joined Sodoma Law, P.C. to continue her family law practice. Ms. Manfreda\'s reputation and committment to family law is an exciting addition to our firm. Please join us in welcoming her.

Choosing a Guardian for your Children

2011-08-15T18:39:07+00:00

Our incredibly busy lives make us all prone to focus primarily on needs that are immediate but not necessarily most important. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the case of parents who spend more time selecting and preparing instructions for a babysitter than selecting and preparing instructions for a guardian for their children. Babysitter issues are undoubtedly important and capture our attention because they are immediate needs. However, the babysitter will spend only a few hours with your children, and you will be only a phone call away if any questions arise. Even more important is selecting a guardian to care for your children in the event an accident leaves your children without their parents.

Despite the fact that a guardian would devote years to raising your children and make many crucial decisions about your children’s well-being, the selection of a guardian is a decision a surprising number of parents put on the back burner. Certainly no one likes to contemplate their children growing up without them, but the risk of ignoring that possibility is that, if the unthinkable happens and you have not nominated a guardian for your children, a court will have to make the decision without your input. The future of your children is simply too important to leave to the discretion of the courts when you are the one most qualified to know what is in your children’s best interests.

Consider the following steps toward making the best decision for your children.

1. Identify Your Parenting Priorities. In raising your children, what is most important to you? What do you consider to be in their best interests? Impartation of certain moral values or religious beliefs? A private school education? A large yard or safe neighborhood where they can run and play freely? A stable upbringing in the same community? Diverse life experiences? Having one parent at home or with a significant amount of flexibility and free time to devote to the children? A proactive parenting style or a relaxed parenting style? Strong encouragement of advanced education? Maintaining a certain standard of living?

2. Narrow Your List. You are an unusually fortunate parent if you have people in your life to be guardians for your children who possess all of your same priorities or are in a position to make all of your priorities a reality. So, give some serious thought to your priorities, and narrow your list down to those which are non-negotiable.

3. List Potential Guardians. Come up with as long an initial list as you can. At a minimum, guardian candidates should be mature, responsible, and people with whom your children feel comfortable.

4. Compare Your Priorities List to Your Guardian List. Determine who are the best candidates based on their willingness and ability to meet your top priorities identified in step two. Ideally you will identify a primary guardian and at least one backup guardian. This step may help resolve any disagreement between you and your spouse as to the best guardian candidate since it shifts the analysis from which candidate you like best to which candidate best fits your priorities for your children. Approach this step with an open mind; you may adore your sister more than anyone else in the world next to your children, but if her lifestyle and circumstances in life make it unlikely she will be able to make your priorities for your children her priorities, it may not be in the best interests of your children to nominate her as their guardian. Remember that, in the midst of the immense trauma of losing their parents, what is likely to be most comforting to children is preservation of as much stability and consistency as possible.

5. Talk with the Guardian Candidates. It is absolutely imperative that you have candid conversations with your guardian candidates to be sure they are willing and able to serve as guardians if it becomes necessary. Convey that you would appreciate their complete honesty and that there will be no hard feelings if they feel they cannot accept the responsibility. Now is the time for them to speak up so you have the opportunity to select someone else.

6. Put It in Writing. Under North Carolina law, the courts are required to give your “testamentary recommendation” about a guardian for your children “substantial weight.” Therefore, you must put your guardian nominations in your will. Guardian nominations are one of the primary reasons all parents of young children should have a will.

7. Provide Financial Support. Whether through savings or life insurance, be sure that, if anything happens to you, you have provided money to support your children to the greatest extent possible. This may impact the results of steps four and five since the guardian candidates’ ability to meet your priorities and accept responsibility for your children may affected by finances. In addition to funds to cover basic necessities, consider having sufficient savings or insurance to cover private school, college education, a home with a yard, or a stay-at-home guardian if those are among your priorities for your children.

8. Leave Instructions. Consider writing a letter to the guardian about your desires for your children and your requests regarding their upbringing. The priorities you identified in step one will be a starting place for this letter. Seal the letter and a copy of your will in an envelope and give it to the guardian. While an instruction letter is not legally enforceable, the guardian will be grateful for the guidance and insight into your wishes. The letter may also be meaningful to your children one day as an expression of your care for them and hopes for their future.

Odds are that you live well beyond seeing your children into adulthood, but please don’t take your chances and fail to have any planning in place just in case. Give yourself the peace of mind of knowing you have done all you can to protect and ensure the best interests of your children whatever life might bring.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED ON THIS WEBSITE WAS PREPARED BY SODOMA LAW, P.C. AND IS INTENDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT, IN ANY WAY, CONSIDERED LEGAL ADVICE.

Sodoma Law Welcomes Larissa B. Stein to the Estate Planning Practice Group

2011-07-15T20:40:13+00:00

Sodoma Law is proud to announce attorney Larissa B. Stein has joined the Estate Planning Practice Group. The firm is now able to provide more full-service counsel to families and are excited about Ms. Stein\'s continuing her estate planning practice with us. Please join us in welcoming attorney Larissa B. Stein.

Is a HandWritten Agreement for Alimony Valid?

2011-05-25T21:58:24+00:00

The 2009 Court of Appeals case Sluder v. Sluder addresses this very issue. Husband signed a statement that was handwritten promising to pay Wife $1,000.00 per month in spousal support. The handwritten statement was as follows: “I Gary M. Sluder pay to my wife Christina, the sum of One Thousand Dollars a month in spousal support.” The trial court found that Husband agreed to pay Wife $1,000.00 per month so she would have proof of income to rent an apartment. The trial court ruled in favor of the Wife and ordered Husband to pay Wife $11,000.00 for the previous eleven months. Husband appealed the ruling of the trial court on the basis that the agreement was not enforceable because the agreement was not signed by both parties before a certifying officer. The Court of Appeals ruled that the statement was not valid because it was not notarized before a certifying officer. North Carolina General Statute § 52-10.1 governs support agreements made in the context of a parties’ separation. The Statute states in part: “Any married couple is hereby authorized to execute a separation agreement not inconsistent with public policy which shall be legal, valid and binding in all respects; provided, that the separation agreement must be in writing and acknowledged by both parties before a certifying officer as defined in North Carolina General Statute 52-10(b). Such certifying officer must not be a party to the contract.”

The moral of this story is agreements between married and/or separated persons can be complicated and confusing. The best course of action before signing an agreement of any sort is to consult an attorney.

The legal precedent established by cases such as Sluder v. Sluder is always subject to change due to action by the North Carolina General Assembly, decisions by a higher court, or legislative action taken by the Congress of the United States of America. Therefore, it is always imperative to seek the advice of legal counsel that is apprised and familiar with the law as it relates to your case.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED ON THIS WEBSITE WAS PREPARED BY SODOMA LAW, P.C. AND IS INTENDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT, IN ANY WAY, CONSIDERED LEGAL ADVICE.

Congratulations to the Crime Victims\' Coalition

2011-04-13T18:55:18+00:00

Reshaping the Future. Honoring the Past. On April 13, 2011, the Crime Victims\' Coalition held its 4th Annual Awards Luncheon honoring professionals and volunteers who routinely go above and beyond for victims of crime. We applaud their efforts and the Coalition for changing the course of history and transforming lives.

Name Change Tips from IRS

2011-02-22T18:23:49+00:00

If you changed your name as a result of a recent marriage or divorce, you will want to take the necessary steps to ensure the name on your tax return matches the name registered with the Social Security Administration. A mismatch between the name shown on your tax return and the SSA records can cause problems in the processing of your return and may even delay your refund.

Here are five tips from the IRS for recently married or divorced taxpayers who have a name change.

1. If you took your spouse’s last name or if both spouses hyphenate their last names, you may run into complications if you don’t notify the SSA. When newlyweds file a tax return using their new last names, IRS computers can’t match the new name with their Social Security Number.

2. If you were recently divorced and changed back to your previous last name, you’ll also need to notify the SSA of this name change.

3. Informing the SSA of a name change is easy: Just file a Form SS-5, Application for a Social Security Card at your local SSA office, and provide a recently issued document as proof of your legal name change.

4. Form SS-5 is available on SSA’s website at http://www.socialsecurity.gov, by calling 800-772-1213 or at local offices. Your new card will have the same number as your previous card, but will show your new name.

5. If you adopted your spouse’s children after getting married, you’ll want to make sure the children have an SSN. Taxpayers must provide an SSN for each dependent claimed on a tax return. For adopted children without SSNs, the parents can apply for an Adoption Taxpayer Identification Number – or ATIN – by filing Form W-7A, Application for Taxpayer Identification Number for Pending U.S. Adoptions with the IRS. The ATIN is a temporary number used in place of an SSN on the tax return. Form W-7A is available on the IRS website at http://www.irs.gov, or by calling 800-TAX-FORM (800-829-3676).

Sodoma Law Hosts President Obama\'s Advisor

2011-01-29T18:02:55+00:00

Sodoma Law was proud to host President Barack Obama\'s Advisor on Environmental Policy on Friday, January 28, 2011. Nancy Sutley, the Council on Environmental Quality\'s Chairperson, facilitated a round table discussion on renewable and clean energy initiatives for North Carolina in support of the President\'s recent State of the Union address.

Nicole Sodoma named Legal Elite by Business North Carolina

2010-12-17T15:32:12+00:00

Nicole Sodoma was selected as one of Business North Carolina’s Legal Elite. Winners are chosen not by Business North Carolina editors but by the state\'s lawyers. Business North Carolina\'s Legal Elite has become the model for other awards and lists, but it remains unique as the only award that gives every active lawyer in the state the opportunity to participate. Business North Carolina\'s Legal Elite includes the top lawyers chosen using this statewide ballot. Congratulations!

Save the Date! Free Seminar!

2010-10-28T13:44:10+00:00

On Tuesday, November 16, 2010, attorney Misty Hardison will continue her series of free seminars offered by Sodoma Law, P.C. to help educate you, or someone you know, about issues related to separation and divorce. For more information, contact us at 704.442.0000 or email info@sodomalaw.com. Space is limited so mark your calendars and join us on November 16, 2010. Look forward to seeing you soon.

Changes to Child Custody Orders

2010-10-25T13:04:52+00:00

Child Custody Orders may be modified based on a substantial change in circumstances which warrant a modification of the existing child custody order. The substantial change of circumstances must affect the welfare of the minor child. To many, this standard may seem vague and confusing. A recent Court of Appeals case Patten v. Werner discusses the issue of modifying custody. Father filed a motion to modify a current custody order asking the Court to grant him primary physical custody of the parties’ minor child.

In this case, Father and Mother were divorced. After the divorce, an order was entered granting Mother primary physical custody of the child with Father having liberal visitation. Mother then remarried and her new spouse was the center of Father’s motion to modify custody. Mother’s new husband had been arrested for driving while intoxicated and his license had been revoked; however, Mother continued to allow her new husband to drive with the child. The child had allegedly witnessed domestic violence which led to the new husband being charged with assault. Additionally, the child’s absences and tardy marks at school had increased.

The key issue in cases of this nature is whether the facts and circumstances affect the welfare and well-being of the minor child. The trial court found that due to Mother and new husband’s behavior and the home environment they had created, the child’s welfare and well-being had, in fact, been affected.

The trial court modified custody and awarded primary custody to Father. The trial court considered the changes described above and how they affected the child and determined it was in the child’s best interest to modify custody.

The Court of Appeals affirmed the trial court’s decision to modify custody and award Father primary physical custody of the minor child.

The legal precedent established by cases such as Patten v. Werner is always subject to change due to action by the North Carolina General Assembly, decisions by a higher court, or legislative action taken by the Congress of the United States of America. Therefore, it is always imperative to seek the advice of legal counsel that is apprised and familiar with the law as it relates to your case.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED ON THIS WEBSITE WAS PREPARED BY SODOMA LAW, P.C. AND IS INTENDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT, IN ANY WAY, CONSIDERED LEGAL ADVICE.

Unwed Father\'s Consent for Adoption

2010-10-03T18:16:35+00:00

In a recent Court of Appeals case, In re Adoption of K.A.R., the Court discusses the issue of when an unwed biological father’s consent is needed for adoption of a child. In this case, the Mother and Father were very young; 18 and 20, respectively. Upon confirmation that Mother was in fact pregnant, both Father and Mother acknowledged that Father was the biological father. Father attended some prenatal doctor appointments with Mother until she asked him to stop attending with her.

Approximately five months prior to the birth of the child, the Father got a job earning $8.00 dollars an hour and began purchasing supplies for the unborn child. Father bought a crib mattress, a car seat and more than $200.00 in clothing. Even though Mother rebuffed these attempts by Father to provide assistance and support, Father still independently bought items for the unborn child which were commensurate with his financial means and resources. Additionally, Father made it clear throughout the pregnancy that he would not consent to an adoption.

Despite Father’s objections, four days after the child’s birth, Mother placed the child with an adoptive couple (Petitioners) who wanted to adopt the child. The Petitioners filed a Petition for Adoption which indicated they did not believe the biological father’s consent was needed. The trial court concluded that Father’s consent was needed for the adoption because he had provided reasonable support given his financial means prior to the filing of the Petition for Adoption. In addition, the Court stated that despite Mother rebuffing Father’s efforts to provide direct support for the child, he still continued to communicate regularly with the Mother about the pregnancy and his opposition to the adoption. The bright line statutory rule is that a father’s consent is needed for an adoption if he has provided reasonable support given his financial means prior to the filing of the Petition for Adoption. The Petitioners appealed the trial court’s decision that the Father’s consent was necessary to the North Carolina Court of Appeals. The North Carolina Court of Appeals affirmed the trial court’s decision that the Father’s consent to the adoption was necessary.

The legal precedent established by cases such as In re Adoption of K.A.R. is always subject to change due to action by the North Carolina General Assembly, decisions by a higher court, or legislative action taken by the Congress of the United States of America. Therefore, it is always imperative to seek the advice of legal counsel that is apprised and familiar with the law as it relates to your case.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED ON THIS WEBSITE WAS PREPARED BY SODOMA LAW, P.C. AND IS INTENDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT, IN ANY WAY, CONSIDERED LEGAL ADVICE.

Congratulations to Deb Dilman!

2010-09-26T16:52:05+00:00

Attorney Deb Dilman finished strong in her first triathalon today in Huntersville, North Carolina. The Ramblin\' Rose Charlotte featured an amazing venue, beautiful bike course, intimate and energy packed run course, and a spectacular finish line. Congratulations Deb on an outstanding accomplishment!

Nicole Sodoma named a 2010 Mover & Shaker by Business Leader Magazine

2010-09-21T15:09:25+00:00

After receiving her nomination by the Charlotte Women\'s Bar, Ms. Sodoma was incredibly honored to receive the 2010 Mover & Shaker award presented to her by Business Leader Magazine. The event recognizes the achievements of business owners, senior executives and top professionals who fulfill vital roles in the success of their organizations through their leadership, creativity and innovation as well as their committment to supporting the local Charlotte community. Congratulations to Ms. Sodoma and Sodoma Law for all of their achievements.

Divorcing? What You Can Do For Your Children.

2010-08-21T23:37:14+00:00

Children are often the main concern, and source of disagreement, for most divorcing couples. However, most people do not realize that with the right goals in mind, parties can divorce in a way that will allow their children to transition in an emotionally healthy manner.

When couples decide to divorce, the couple may choose to focus on co-parenting. Co-parenting is a term that is used when a divorcing couple works with each other, instead of against each other, to maintain consistency in the parenting of their children. The parents place their focus on working amicably together to raise healthy and happy children.

Consistency and communication between the two households are essential to co-parenting. This does not mean that both households need to be identical; however, similar schedules and discipline help the children deal with the changes their family is going through. In addition, both parents should stay actively involved in children’s school and extracurricular activities.

It is best to lay out the expectation of co-parenting at the beginning of your divorce proceedings. By doing so, you make it clear to your attorney and your spouse what your main goal will be. This also allows your attorney to guide you through the process with the ultimate goal of a amicable divorce in mind.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED ON THIS WEBSITE WAS PREPARED BY SODOMA LAW, P.C. AND IS INTENDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT, IN ANY WAY, CONSIDERED LEGAL ADVICE.

August 18, 2010 - Free Seminar

2010-08-11T20:01:36+00:00

Child Custody and Child Support Questions? Save the Date! Attorney Misty Hardison will lead her second free seminar offered by Sodoma Law, P.C. to help educate you, or someone you know, about issues related to child custody and child support. For more information, contact us at 704.442.0000 or email info@sodomalaw.com. Space is limited so mark your calendars and join us on Wednesday, August 18, 2010. Look forward to seeing you soon.

Understanding North Carolina Child Support Guidelines

2010-07-05T13:35:21+00:00

North Carolina uses specific child support guidelines to determine how much money the payor parent owes each month. These guidelines take into account not only the need for adequate housing for the child, but also essential items for the child’s well-being such as clothing, food, household expenses, utilities, transportation and school-related expenses. The goal of the child support guidelines is to provide consistency and financial stability in a child’s life, which includes these direct and indirect expenses.

North Carolina’s child support guidelines are based on an Income Shares Model which considers the monthly gross incomes of both parents. Gross income is a parent’s total income every month, prior to the withholding of taxes. Gross Income may not just be salary or payroll wages a parent receives from his or her respective employment. Income may be derived from any source to include income a parent may receive from stock dividends, disability payments, or any other financial resource.

Unlike the more traditional models, the Income Shares Model takes into account the income of BOTH parents, not just the payor parent. This model developed from the theory that financially supporting the child of a marriage is the responsibility of both parents. Therefore, the child should receive the same proportion of financial support from each parent’s income that the child would have received if the parents lived together. For example, if both parents work and make the same amount of money monthly, they should each respectively contribute 50 percent to the support of their child.

To ease the burdensome calculations and to determine the proportion each parent should contribute, North Carolina uses tables based on the Income Shares Model. Contact your attorney at Sodoma Law to determine your support calculation based on the tables provided or to determine whether your child support calculation should deviate, in any way, from that model. As not every child’s needs may be met within these child support guidelines, a deviation from the guidelines may be warranted.

Child support guidelines are updated every four years, and 2010 is the next scheduled year for any necessary modifications to the guidelines.

Contact your attorney at Sodoma Law to make sure your child’s rights are adequately protected.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED ON THIS WEBSITE WAS PREPARED BY SODOMA LAW, P.C. AND IS INTENDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT, IN ANY WAY, CONSIDERED LEGAL ADVICE.

Attorney Deb Dilman Receives Award from BLOC

2010-06-20T00:34:43+00:00

In recognition of her dedication and commitment to Business Leaders of Charlotte, Deb Dilman received the Newcomer of the Year Award on Friday, June 18, 2010. Through this program, Ms. Dilman led sponsorship efforts to raise more than $20,000 for non-profit organizations to include McCreesh Place in Charlotte. We congratulate Ms. Dilman for her outstanding leadership and devotion to our community and to others.

Save the Date - June 2, 2010

2010-05-15T01:03:15+00:00

Attorney Misty Hardison will begin the first of a series of free seminars offered by Sodoma Law, P.C. to help educate you, or someone you know, about issues related to separation and divorce. For more information, contact us at 704.442.0000 or email info@sodomalaw.com. Space is limited so mark your calendars and join us on June 2, 2010. Look forward to seeing you soon.

I think I need a protection order but what kind?

2010-04-18T13:14:03+00:00

North Carolina provides two basic types of protective orders; a 50B Domestic Violence Protective Order and a 50C No-Contact Order.

There are two requirements under North Carolina law in order for a victim to obtain a 50B Domestic Violence Protective Order. First, a certain relationship must exist between the two parties. North Carolina General Statue §50B-1(b) states that parties must be current or former spouses, have a child together, currently share or have formerly shared a household, have a parent-child relationship, or are currently or were formerly in a dating relationship with each other. Second, statute §50B-1(a) provides that the defendant must cause, or attempt to cause, bodily harm to the victim, or place the victim, or a member of the victim’s household, in fear of serious bodily harm or continued harassment.

If the parties meet these two requirements, a victim can petition the court for a 50B protective order. Emergency 50B Domestic Violence Protective Orders are available for victims who may need immediate legal protection. In this case a formal hearing will be held within 10 days of the issuance of the emergency order. Under North Carolina General Statute §50B-3(b) Domestic Violence Protective Orders are issued for a fixed period of time and do not exceed 1 year; however, the order may be renewed, but the renewal may exceed 2 years.

For victims who do not meet the requirements for a 50B order, it may be possible for them to receive a 50C No-Contact Order. There is no prerequisite relationship that must exist between the parties to obtain this order. North Carolina General Statute §50C-2 only requires that a person be the victim of unlawful conduct, which includes stalking and non-consensual sexual acts.

If a victim meets the requirement for a 50C No-Contact Order, the victim can petition the court for a temporary or permanent order. Temporary orders are generally issued when immediate protection is needed. If a temporary order is issued, a hearing will be held within 10 days to determine if a permanent order is needed. Under North Carolina Statue 50C-8 a permanent No-Contact Order may not exceed one year in duration.

There is also a difference in the remedies available for violation of the two orders. If a defendant violates a 50B Domestic Violence Protective Order under North Carolina General Statute §50B-4.1, they may be immediatly arrested and are guilty of a misdemeanor. However, North Carolina General Statute §50C-10 states that a defendant is guilty of contempt of court if a violation of a No-Contact Order occurs.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED ON THIS WEBSITE WAS PREPARED BY SODOMA LAW, P.C. AND IS INTENDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT, IN ANY WAY, CONSIDERED LEGAL ADVICE.

Cohabitating Couples Gain Rights Through Contract Law

2010-03-23T11:50:43+00:00

Cohabitation is on the rise in America. The 2000 Census found that there was a 72% increase in the number of cohabitating couples in this country during the decade between the 1990 and 2000 census. The 2000 census also reported that 144,000 unmarried couples lived together in North Carolina. These numbers are expected to increase again in the upcoming 2010 census.

Until 2006, North Carolina was one of several states with laws that criminalized the cohabitation of unmarried adults. However, North Carolina’s law was ruled unconstitutional by a State Superior Court Judge on the basis that the state’s law violated the United State’s Supreme Courts ruling in Lawrence v. Texas. 539 U.S. 558 (2003). In Lawrence, the Supreme Court found that consensual adult sexual acts, in the privacy of one’s own home, received protection under the due process clause of the 14^th Amendment.

There are many reasons a couple may chose to cohabitate rather then marry; however, cohabitating couples should be aware that their rights differ greatly from people in a legally recognized marriage. The difference in the amount of protection the law provides is staggering. Unmarried couples do not share the same rights as married couples in making health care decisions for each other, inheriting property after death, and dividing property when a relationship ends.

Cohabitating couples wishing to establish some rights may do so through the use of a cohabitation agreement, also known as a domestic partnership agreement. These agreements are essentially a written contract between the couple which may outline a multitude of things; including what property each partner brings into the relation, the division of that property in the event the relationship ends, the duties of each partner in the relationship, and what will happen to the property of the relationship at the death of one partner. It is best to meet with your attorney to discuss what type of agreement would best suit you and your partner’s needs.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED ON THIS WEBSITE WAS PREPARED BY SODOMA LAW, P.C. AND IS INTENDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT, IN ANY WAY, CONSIDERED LEGAL ADVICE.

Deb Dilman Participates in 4ALL Statewide Service Day at WBTV Charlotte

2010-03-05T22:07:31+00:00

Attorney Deb Dilman participated in 4ALL Statewide Service Day on March 5, 2010. The phones at WBTV in Charlotte were expected to ring constantly as citizens in all 100 counties were encouraged to call in to volunteer attorneys providing free legal information via telephone. The statewide service project coinicides with the North Carolina Bar Association\'s 4ALL Campaign to provide civil legal aid to the poor. Thank you to Deb Dilman for her participation and for offering her time and talent to those in need.

Nicole Sodoma Named Charlotte\'s Top 50

2010-02-22T19:48:20+00:00

Nicole Sodoma was honored today by Business Leader Magazine as one of Charlotte\'s top fifty entrepeneurs for 2010. Ms. Sodoma accepted the nomination graciously explaining she was not an entrepeneur, instead a family law attorney who started a family business for the families she serves. She explained that she loves her practice and was just fortunate enough to be surrounded by a team of people who feel the same way. Congratulations to Ms. Sodoma for her award.

Welcome Misty W. Hardison

2010-01-18T18:47:33+00:00

Please join us in welcoming our newest attorney at Sodoma Law, P.C. Misty W. Hardison joined Sodoma Law, P.C. to continue her family law practice. Ms. Hardison has already begun taking new cases. In addition, after only a week in our practice, she conducted a seminar at the Women\'s Commission on issues related to separation and divorce. Ms. Hardison\'s passion for family law makes her a natural fit for our practice. Please join us in welcoming her.

Parental Alienation Can Take a Drastic Toll on Parent-Child Relationship

2010-01-07T00:26:49+00:00

Parental alienation is a fairly new concept; in fact the term has only been around since the late 1980’s. However, it is an ever increasing concern for many because of the drastic toll it can take on the parent-child relationship.

Generally defined, parental alienation is the term used when one parent demeans the other parent openly in front of a child, with the intent, either consciously or subconsciously, to alienate the child from that parent. The parent being demeaned is often called the “targeted” parent, and the parent making the comments is called the “alienator”. Parental alienation is most likely to occur during high conflict divorce cases.
The effects of parental alienation can be sweeping, alienating not only a parent, but an entire extended family including grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. Author Jane Appell, Ph.D. breaks parental alienation down into five categories in her book; Divorce Doesn\'t Have to Be That Way: A Handbook for the Helping Professional. As the categories increase as does the level of alienation suffered.First, the child has positive relationships with both parents. Second, a child may begin to show affinity with one parent over the other. Third, a child becomes allied with one parent against the other parent. Fourth, a child is estranged from a parent and shows a negative attitude about the targeted parent. Fifth and most severe, the child is completely alienated from the targeted parent and no longer has any type of relationship with that parent.

Douglas Darnall, Ph.D. states in his article, Three Types of Parent Alienators, that the most difficult part of parental alienation is that anyone in the child’s life can become an alienator; this can include parents, friends, aunts, uncles, or grandparents.

The Parental Alienation Awareness Organization lists several signs parents should look for to detect whether parental alienation is happening to them. These signs can range from a sudden negative attitude toward the targeted parent, blaming the targeted parent for financial problems, asking the child about the targeted parent’s personal life, setting up interferences with the targeted parent’s visitation schedule, and asking the child to choose one parent over the other.

So what do you do if you find yourself a target of parental alienation? The first step is to contact your attorney. Your attorney can make the judge in your custody case aware of what is happening. Each case and each judge is different. A judge may simply begin by ordering the alienating parent to stop their harmful actions and take steps to repair the damaged caused. However, is some severe cases, judges have reversed the original custody order and given custody to the targeted parent.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED ON THIS WEBSITE WAS PREPARED BY SODOMA LAW, P.C. AND IS INTENDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT, IN ANY WAY, CONSIDERED LEGAL ADVICE.

Sodoma Law Bowls Strikes for Charity

2009-12-07T00:07:21+00:00

In support of local families during the holiday season, Sodoma Law, P.C. teamed up with the Business Leaders of Charlotte to make a difference in the community. Through pledges and donations, many families in Charlotte will benefit from this event. Gifts will be wrapped and delivered just in time for the holidays. Sodoma Law, P.C. was thankful to share in this opportunity. Happy Holidays.

Unmarried Fathers Should Know Their Rights

2009-12-03T03:16:40+00:00

Fathers trying to gain visitation with their child or custody of their child should be aware of the distinctions in rights made between married and unmarried fathers. In North Carolina, there is a vast difference between a father’s rights regarding their children when they are married to the mother of their child, and a father’s rights when they are not married to the mother of their child.

Under state law, when a child is born to a married mother and father, that child is presumed to be a child of that marriage (North Carolina General Statute § 49‑12.1). This means that the father is automatically, in the eyes of the law, the legitimate father, and no further action is needed to establish paternity of the child.

In contrast, when a child is born to an unmarried couple, a father’s rights regarding that child are not immediately established. This is true even if the father is listed on the child’s birth certificate. Paternity must first be established before a father can have any rights and obligations regarding visitation or support of his child.

North Carolina statutes allow a child to be legitimized in one of two ways: through the subsequent marriage of the child’s mother and father (North Carolina General Statute § 49‑12), or through the declaration made by the child’s father to the court (North Carolina General Statute NCGS § 49‑10).

Once paternity is established, an unmarried father has the same rights as a married father. This means a father has the right to visitation or custody of the child, as deemed appropriate by the court, and that the father has to fulfill support obligations owed to the child. If you are an unmarried father needing to establish your rights, contact your attorney for assistance through these court proceedings.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED ON THIS WEBSITE WAS PREPARED BY SODOMA LAW, P.C. AND IS INTENDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT, IN ANY WAY, CONSIDERED LEGAL ADVICE.

Alienation of Affections and Criminal Conversation Actions Receive Changes in House Bill

2009-10-28T01:47:54+00:00

North Carolina is one of only a handful of states that recognize certain “heart balm” actions, which include alienation of affection and criminal conversation (and no, criminal conversation has nothing to do with talking to a criminal). These unique tort actions allow for a spouse to recover from a third party for their interference in the marital relationship.

However, North Carolina has recently passed and enacted House Bill 1110, “An Act to Clarify Procedures in Civil Actions for Alienation of Affections and Criminal Conversation”. This bill leaves the basic requirements to bring one of these heart balm actions the intact, but it modifies some of the procedures to bring one of these claims before the court.

There are three requirements to bring a claim of alienation of affection against someone. All three must be present. They are: 1) a marriage, containing genuine love and affection, existed between the plaintiff and the plaintiff’s spouse, 2) the defendant acted maliciously, and 3) the love and affection was destroyed by the defendant’s malicious acts.

A claim of criminal conversation has only two requirements. Both must be present. The requirements are 1) a valid marriage existed between the plaintiff and the plaintiff’s spouse, and 2) the defendant had sexual intercourse with the plaintiff’s spouse during the marriage.

Prior to the new bill, a plaintiff could bring a claim against a defendant, even if the action giving rise to the claim occurred after the married coupled separated. This meant if one spouse moved out of the marital residence, and then began dating; the new dating partner (the third party) opened themselves up to potential legal liability.

House Bill 1110 changed this aspect. Once the bill took effect on October 1, 2009, a claim of criminal conversation or alienation of affection cannot be brought against a third party after the spouses have physically separated (and one of the spouses has the intent for the physical separate to be permanent).

In addition, the new bill sets the statute of limitations for these heart balm actions at three years. Therefore, any claim of alienation of affection or criminal conversation must be brought before the court within three years of the incident giving rise to the claims.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED ON THIS WEBSITE WAS PREPARED BY SODOMA LAW, P.C. AND IS INTENDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT, IN ANY WAY, CONSIDERED LEGAL ADVICE.

Grandparents Do Have Rights to Grandchild Visitation in North Carolina

2009-10-20T01:43:52+00:00

The right of a grandparent to have visitation with their grandchildren following a divorce has become a highly debated topic. Grandparents are increasingly becoming everyday caretakers to their grandchildren and, in many cases, living under the same roof as their grandchildren. According to the Census Bureau, a study they conducted in 2008 found that approximately 3.8 million multigenerational households exist in the United States.

Even though these living and care arrangements can be beneficial for grandparents, parents, and grandchildren, many grandparents find themselves all but forgotten about when child custody and visitation arrangements are determined by the court. For this reason grandparents in North Carolina should be aware of the rights the state provides for them.

North Carolina General Statute §50‑13.2. (b1) states, “An order for custody of a minor child may provide visitation rights for any grandparent of the child as the court, in its discretion, deems appropriate.” The Court will decide if grandparent visitation is appropriate by making a determination of what is in the “best interest” of the child. The best interest of a child is determined on a case by case basis. No two motions for visitation are ever the same, and the court may consider many different factors to determine what is in the child’s best interest. These factors for grandparent visitation may include, but are certainly not limited to, the length of the relationship between the child and grandparent, the relationship between the child’s parent and the grandparent requesting visitation, and, in some cases, if the child is old enough, the court may take the child’s preferences into account.

Timing is everything for a grandparent wishing to make a visitation request to the court. A grandparent wanting to ensure they receive visitation with their grandchild during divorce proceedings between the child’s parents, will to a certain extent, become part of a parents divorce proceedings. A grandparent will need to enter a petition with the court for visitation while there is pending litigation between the child\'s parents.

If you are a grandparent wishing to make a visitation petition during a divorce proceeding, it is best to consult with your attorney who can adequately represent you during this process.

DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED ON THIS WEBSITE WAS PREPARED BY SODOMA LAW, P.C. AND IS INTENDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT, IN ANY WAY, CONSIDERED LEGAL ADVICE.

Deb Dilman and Nicole Sodoma Attend the NCAWA Annual Conference

2009-10-06T02:44:25+00:00

This three day event was held at the Francis Marion Hotel and the South Carolina Acquarium in Charleston, South Carolina.

Ms. Dilman and Ms. Sodoma were fortunate to meet outstanding and influential leaders to include, the Honorable Sandra Day O\'Connor, Karen Williams and Sarah Parker.

Ms. Dilman is currently the education chairperson of the NCAWA.

Ms. Sodoma is on the board of the local chapter of the NCAWA known as the Charlotte Women\'s Bar.

Welcome Deborah L. Dilman

2009-09-20T23:50:49+00:00

Please join us in welcoming our newest attorney at Sodoma Law, P.C. Deborah L. Dilman joined Sodoma Law, P.C. to continue her family law practice. Ms. Dilman is also committed to her volunteer efforts and her involvement in the local bars of both Union and Mecklenburg Counties. Ms. Dilman is truly an asset to our firm. Please join us in welcoming her to our practice.

Council For Children\'s Rights - September 21, 2009 - Save the Date

2009-08-16T17:22:26+00:00

On September 21, 2009, the Council for Children\'s Rights will hold its 30th Annual Meeting. The lunch raises awareness of children\'s needs in Charlotte and North Carolina. Last year, the team from Sodoma Law, P.C. attended this exciting event. Mark your calendars! Attendance this year is expected to be more than 500. The event is to be held at the Westin Charlotte from 12:00 - 1:30 pm. For more information, check out www.cfcrights.org/events or simply ask a member of our team.

Sodoma Law Teams With Legal Representation Project

2009-04-01T00:34:32+00:00

In 2007, there were 3,639 victims of domestic violence who sought help from United Family Services’ Victim Assistance Domestic Violence Program. Despite efforts of organizations in the community, a gap in pro bono legal assistance for domestic violence victims exists in Mecklenburg County. In addition, most pro bono agencies do not assist victims with additional representation in Civil Court proceedings including child custody, child support, separation and/or divorce. Victims who leave abusive partners face many barriers. The Court System is viewed as one of the most difficult systems to navigate successfully. Economic abuse leads to unfair trials where the batterer often has an attorney and the victim is left to fight for herself or himself. This inequitable distribution of justice leads to re-victimization and, in some cases, the victim returning to the batterer to avoid becoming homeless or living without his or her children.

The Legal Representation Project is a volunteer network that works with United Family Services. The mission is to increase the number of pro bono attorneys who are trained in domestic violence to represent victims in all civil court proceedings from the Domestic Violence Protective Order hearings (“the 10 day”) to custody, child support, separation and/or divorce. The goal of the Legal Representation Project is to give victims of domestic violence a choice and a chance: a choice of legal representation in civil court proceedings and a chance to be safe from domestic violence.

Sodoma Law, P.C. has committed to the Legal Representation Project in taking one pro bono case per month in an effort to help the project reach its goal and mission in Mecklenburg County.

If you need assistance, and would like to take advantage of the Legal Representation Project, contact Sodoma Law, P.C. or contact the coordinator, Sheila Passenant, directly at Victim\'s Assistance, 732 East Fourth Street, Suite 204. You may also call 704-926-7508 or email Ms. Passenant at spassenant@ufsclt.org.

Welcome to Sodoma Law

2009-02-01T17:53:51+00:00

Welcome to Sodoma Law, P.C. Here you will find the latest news and events and other articles of interest for you.