Sodoma Law Managing Principal Nicole Sodoma was recently asked to give her input on how to keep a marriage happy by Brides.com, here’s what she had to say.
Know That Things Change
“For those looking to get married (insert flashing warning light here): the people we marry are not the people we divorce,” Nicole Sodoma, managing principal, Sodoma Law, tells Brides. “People change and not at the same pace or in the way you dreamed when you said ‘yes.’ In fact, there are many people that will be married many times—but to the same person if they can courageously and loyally commit to acknowledging the change and working through it at whatever pace works in their marriage.” How do you cope with both of you changing and evolving? Sodoma suggests seeking advice and help, whether it’s from friends and family or professionals. Talking to other people and getting objective input can make all the difference.
For a relationship to work—and for a marriage to survive—you have to be willing to meet in the middle. “Marriage will be the hardest thing you will do (aside from becoming a parent),” Sodoma says. “Compromise and putting someone else’s interests ahead of yours on a regular basis is not necessarily easy or natural behavior. And, saying SORRY is meaningless unless you know why you are apologizing and will use your best efforts not to rinse and repeat.”